I’m not a fan of political labels. So I’m not a feminist. Nor am I a “Men’s Rights Activist” or MGTOW or whatever else the internet has come up with in the past 4 hours.
I believe in what I believe, and so should you. If it’s based on facts and reality. And as long as it actually makes sense.
Which is why today I wanted to write a response article over a different article titled “160+ examples of male privilege in all areas of life” by Maisha Johnson of EverydayFeminism.
In the article, Maisha gives over 160 examples of “male privilege” (Depending on if you count the repeats that I point out or not).
However, when I was reading the article I quickly came to the conclusion that at least half of these were bullshit. That, or they were simply not anything that provides a tangible benefit, ie: privilege.
I feel for many women fighting for certain things in today’s society. Which is why some of the points she brings up – I do agree with. 100%. But the vast majority I don’t. Because the vast majority are bullshit.
I think if more people, online and offline, took the time to actually hear the other side out we would be so much better off.
Because in truth, many “feminist” issues are actual issues that should be addressed. I think a lot of men could see that. However, there are a lot of feminist issues that are also complete trash. And women should hear us out on why they are garbage.
It’d make it a lot easier to actually go somewhere with these talks, for both sides.
So, I wrote a response to every single one of this author’s supposed “privileges” that we men receive.
Let’s go through them.
Male Privilege in All Areas of Life
1. You can dominate conversations without being judged. Women are perceived as “too talkative” even when they’re speaking less, with one study showing that women need to make up 60-80% of a group to have equal time in a conversation.
Anybody, male or female, that dominates conversations is annoying. Also, anybody who talks about stupid shit is annoying. Maybe that’s the problem?
2. You’re less likely to be interrupted when you speak – studies of men and women showed that both interrupted women more than men.
I also hate people who interrupt when I’m talking. I can agree with the general hatred in this one.
3. You’re not automatically assumed to not know what you’re talking about – or subjected to mansplaining.
Lol clearly you’ve never seen me at an art fest, painting workshop, or parenthood group – I’m immediately (and correctly) assumed to have no idea what the hell is going on.
4. Common vocabulary favors your gender as the default, with language like “mankind” and “foreman,” and dictionary definitions of words created by men.
Yeah, because men invented it. Big surprise here, world renowned discovery really.
5. You’re subject to less scrutiny for the ways you speak – when people criticize “vocal fry,” for example, they’re more likely to point out when women who do it, and ignore men’s vocal fry.
This sentence makes me want to get fries. Probably because I had to google what “vocal fry” was. But to discuss the main point: I have an accent. I also get ‘scrutiny’ for the way I speak. Who cares?
6. You’re not expected to swear less, apologize more, or other supposedly “lady-like” behaviors that reflect stereotypes of your gender being submissive.
Who expects this? 90 year olds?
I’d feel weird if a women did this.
7. You’re not expected to step aside if someone of another gender is walking in your path.
Yeah I am or I’d run into them.
8. Social norms allow you to take up more physical space.
No, I just take up more physical space because I’m bigger than you, dumbass.
9. Perceptions of how much your gender is represented skew in your favor. When a group is comprised of 17% women, men think it’s 50-50, and at 33%, men believe women are the majority.
How is this a privilege? How do I get any advantage – at all, from this? If anything, it’d be preferential to be in the minority group.
10. You’re less likely to have strangers expect you to smile – it’s so common for women that it’s sparked a widely praised art project called “Stop Telling Women to Smile.”
Trying to make someone happy = bad. Understood.
I’ve never done this, because I don’t care if someone is smiling or not. But I’ve had plenty of people tell me it. I never got mad about it.
11. You can forgo regular grooming during travel, like growing a “backpacker’s beard,” without people judging you for not keeping up with your gender’s expectations, like women shaving their legs.
Literally the only people that care about this is other women.
12. You can buy clothes designed for your gender that have pockets you can actually use – clothes meant for women are often focused on being “slimming,” so purely decorative pockets are common.
Why don’t you just go buy clothes that have pockets?
13. You can buy a car without salespeople assuming you can be taken advantage of. Chances are, you’ll be offered a better price than a woman.
True. I agree with this. Can’t argue it. Learn how to negotiate and you can still get the same price, though. But they’ll always hit you with a higher initial offer.
14. If you’re excluded from mainstream culture, you can find community in “outsider” or counterculture groups like nerd communities without being excluded there also because of your gender.
Nothing is stopping women from this, in fact there are far more “women only” communities available than male variants.
15. You can get praise for ordinary parental duties or for being a single father, while mothers are simply expected to do the same and even criticized for single motherhood.
Single mothers get all kinds of praise, single fathers are barely even recognized. This is complete nonsense.
16. You’re not said to be going against your gender’s “natural instinct” or your role in society by not having children.
Yeah, because it’s true. That is your natural instinct. I guess evolution gave me that privilege.
17. You can be outgoing or open about your choices without people calling you an “attention seeker.”
“My choices”? What does this sentence even mean?
And on top of that, I don’t think I’ve ever heard a male even say “attention seeker”. That’s usually women, again.
18. You can enjoy traditionally “masculine” hobbies like sports without people saying you’re just doing it to impress men.
No one says this. Why couldn’t a woman like cars or sports?
Sex and Relationships
19. You’re more likely to be congratulated for having lots of sex, rather than shamed for it or called a “slut.”
It’s hard for a man to have sex with many beautiful women. It is not hard for a woman to have sex with many handsome men.
20. You’re not judged as a “slut” even for things unrelated to your sex life, like the way you dress or how conventionally attractive you are.
No but we’re judged as creeps or douchebags depending on how we look lol.
21. You’re not judged as a “prude” for making your own choices about who you don’t want to have sex with.
Again, this is some imaginary shit the author made up in her head. If anything, most men would be happy to see a woman being picky.
22. You’re not taught that your sexuality exists only for other people – or stigmatized for masturbating.
My sexuality exists for myself and myself alone – I don’t care what others think and neither should you.
23. The media, popular sex advice, and normative definitions of sex focus primarily on your pleasure, especially if you’re cisgender.
Yeah that’s because women are the only ones that read/watch that shit.
24. School sex ed, religious values, and other pervasive sources of sexual norms don’t treat your gender as more dirty, impure, and undesirable for losing your virginity.
Impure witch alert.
25. Most pornography is made with your gender in mind (and it creates some pretty damaging ideas about women and other genders).
I don’t watch porn so this is completely irrelevant.
26. You can be open about enjoying sex without people feeling automatically entitled to having sex with you.
That sounds more like an individual person problem – I don’t know any men that would immediately feel “entitled” to have sex with anyone. Most men have to earn what they receive, we don’t get entitled.
27. You can make changes to your appearance like a haircut or dye without assumptions that you’re doing it for men.
Who here thinks that women dye their hair blue, purple, or red for men? No one? Okay. If anything, it’s usually a clear indication to “stay away” moreso than to attract.
And when men dye their hair, it’s usually because they have become mentally deranged. See: CO movie theater shooter.
28. People don’t assume something’s wrong with you if you don’t want to get married – or insist you must be lying, and warn you that “time is running out.”
Because something is wrong with you if you don’t want to get married, you get all the benefits of marriage and men get hardly any. You’d be stupid to not want to capitalize on that.
29. You’re not expected to change your name if you get married or questioned if you don’t.
Fair. I’ll give this one. Albeit tiny it is. It’s a tradition. Kind of like men literally getting on their knees to marry you.
30. Products like Viagra exist with the aim of helping cisgender men maintain their sex lives as they get older, and social norms congratulate you for doing so. There is far less support for women to continue being sexual beings as they age.
There are tons of resources and aids available to assist women with sex as they age. Men have one: Viagra. That’s it. You have the privilege here, just like how you have the privilege of having 90% of all the birth control options while men have 2 if you count abstinence.
31. You can be expressive about your sexuality in conversation, art, music, and more, without people accusing you of “using your body to get by.”
This is hilarious. Let’s break it down:
- You can be expressive about your sexuality in
conversation without people accusing you of “using your body to get by.”
- Who the hell would discuss sexuality in conversation and get hit with a “using your body to get by” comment?
- You can be expressive about your sexuality in
art without people accusing you of “using your body to get by.”
- Have you ever been to an art convention in your life or are you just making stuff up in your head to get mad on the internet? Most artists explore sexual nature in-depth, regardless of gender or stereotypical consequences.
- You can be expressive about your sexuality in
music without people accusing you of “using your body to get by.”
- Dude what – have you not seen male music videos? They are 110% using their attractiveness to increase viewership. Without freaking question.
32. You can participate in kink, BDSM, and other alternative sexual practices without being judged as a “slut” or facing assumptions that you’re not in control of your own sexual choices.
They’re all weird, male or female.
33. You can be non-monogamous without people judging you for going against your gender’s “nature.”
No, no we definitely cannot. We are told to settle down and marry just like you.
34. If you’re in a relationship with someone of another gender, you’re not expected to do more emotional labor in the relationship.
You clearly have never dated a woman.
35. Getting married to someone of another gender doesn’t mean more domestic labor for you – studies show that husbands add an average of 7 extra hours of housework a week for their wives.
Wow we get one benefit of marriage out of the 5000 you get, how unfair and privileged of us. Studies also show that married men work more hours per week at work than single men.
Gendered Harassment and Violence
36. You’re less likely to be the target of street harassment. The majority of women have experienced street harassment in their lives, and most of the men who do are queer or gender non-conforming.
This one time I got into a fist fight with a homeless guy on the street when I was like 22. Pretty sure that qualifies as a more extreme version of “street harassment” than some weirdo calling you cute. We are all in this camp.
37. You can have a casual, friendly interaction with a stranger, like exchanging a smile or responding to a greeting, without worrying about that stranger taking it as a sexual invitation and telling you to “lighten up” if you don’t.
Women can definitely take that as a sexual invitation too. That is not mutually our issue – I’ve had it happen before too. Same boat, pal.
38. You can turn down a date without worrying about being verbally attacked, physically assaulted, or even killed.
I agree with the latter part: it’s unlikely I’d be assaulted or killed. I also think it’s unlikely for you, too.
But verbally attacked? Are you nuts? Anytime I turn a woman down it’s immediately “ur gay”, “u wudn’t be able to satisfy me anyway”, or “I bet you have a small penis”.
39. You can drink in a bar alone unbothered. In many other public spaces, including bookstores, coffee shops, festivals, and more, a woman alone is often assumed to be available for men to talk to and harass.
I wish, there’s always an old guy that wants to tell me his life story somewhere. Swear I think I’m on a list somewhere.
40. You can travel alone without worrying about being targeted for violence because of your gender.
No one targets you because you’re a woman. They do it because you are weaker and thus an easier target. But, I do agree with this. It is easier for me to travel alone. But it’s also easier for me to travel alone than a small weak looking dude.
41. You’re less likely to experience intimate partner violence.
We get hit with slaps and frying pans just as often, I am sure. It’s just men are stronger and cause more damage.
Yet, this is a fair point.
42. You’re less likely to be stalked.
Considering my own past I find that hard to believe.
43. You’re less likely to be the victim of revenge porn.
44. You’re less likely to be raped, especially if you never go to prison.
But much more likely to be raped, if we do go to prison. And to have our rape shrugged off and not considered worthy of discussion regardless of where/how it happens.
45. You’re less likely to be homeless as a result of intimate partner violence. Half of all homeless women and children in the US are fleeing intimate partner violence.
Way to spin the facts, the vast majority of homeless are men.
46. You’re less likely to be physically injured by a partner. Intimate partner violence is the leading cause of injury to women, more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined.
This is the exact same as 41, think of something new.
47. You’re less likely to be killed by a partner. Researchers estimate that 40 to 70 percent of women who are murder victims were killed by a husband or boyfriend.
Vast majority of murder victims are male. Again, you’re spinning the facts.
48. You can enjoy partying without people blaming your “lifestyle” if you’re sexually assaulted.
No I can’t. If I partied it up and got AIDS everyone would blame my lifestyle for that. As they should.
49. You’re less likely to be blamed for your own sexual assault based on what you were wearing.
50. You can set a drink down at a party without having to worry about being drugged and assaulted.
Nope, just as easy for me to get drugged as you. Some people just like to be dicks. I wouldn’t trust any drink I have lost track of.
51. Common ideas about preventing rape don’t hold you accountable for not perpetuating sexual violence – instead they put the responsibility on women to avoid being victims, and blame on women who are victims.
Obviously it’s my responsibility to not rape someone. Every man knows this. No one blames the woman.
52. Your choices about your sex life are less likely to be misused to rationalize violence against your gender, like when violent men justify hurting women because they can’t get laid.
Incels aren’t us.
53. You can stand in a crowded area like on public transportation without worrying about being groped.
You should bring brass knuckles, because if someone touches you that is assault and gives you free reign to bust the dude. I’d be down for that.
54. You don’t have to carry a lifetime of both constant risks to your safety and constant doubts that you’re telling the truth about it.
Everyone is at risk all the time. Humans are not predictable. You are not special.
Health and Body
55. You can age naturally without being judged for “letting yourself go” if you experience changes like graying hair, gaining weight, or getting wrinkles without using cosmetic products to cover these changes up.
Two words: “dad bod”, lol.
56. Your gender is considered to get “finer with age,” while women are considered less desirable.
We are not considered to get finer with age: we actually do. Studies show that men peak in their 30’s and usually don’t decline much from there, whereas women nosedrive after 25. This is just reality, not a privilege. Unless you consider reality a privilege.
57. You’re under less pressure to be thin, and face fewer social and economic consequences of being fat than women do.
Anyone that is fat should face consequences because it raises my health insurance premium.
58. You aren’t expected to eat less, with ideas of being “lady-like” including dainty portions.
When has a guy ever cared how much a women eats? Again, this is in your head.
59. Doctors are more likely to take you seriously when you tell them your symptoms.
Fuck no, they just tell me to “tough it out”. It is way easier to get taken seriously at a doctor’s as a woman. They just give me prescription strength Tylenol and say ride it out.
60. While medical research often ignores women and other genders, you get the benefits like research focusing on the heart attack symptoms you’re more likely to experience.
“You’re more likely to experience”.
Yeah, what a privilege.
61. You’re less likely to have your physical illness symptoms attributed to psychological factors. For instance, when men and women with identical symptoms mention stress, doctors are more likely to overlook a woman’s symptoms of heart disease.
That’s a problem for men. Because a lot of us have mental issues that go unresolved because of that. They only look for physical things with us, rather than the mental ones. This is clearly a double edged sword.
62. For diseases that affect your gender more, you don’t have to face skepticism about whether or not it’s a “real disease,” like women with conditions like fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue do.
What? Who doesn’t think either of those are diseases?
63. If you’re cisgender, you don’t have issues like period pain and endometriosis associated with your gender, and treatment for pain “as bad as a heart attack” ignored as a result.
Fair. Periods suck. I feel for you guys here.
64. You’re less likely to have mental health issues dismissed as being “hysterical” or “oversensitive.”
Absolutely not. Any mental health issue is immediately overlooked as a male and we’re told to just toughen up.
65. You can get diagnosis and treatment for disorders like ADHD without your symptoms being overlooked due to assumptions about the “typical” behavior of your gender.
Yes, more people on Adderall. Great idea.
We need less scripts, not more.
66. You can show your nipples in public, and are less likely to be harassed overall for showing some skin – even when women in public are using breasts for breastfeeding, they can be subject to harassment.
How is showing my nipples in public a privilege? Why would I even want to do that. Why do you? I have so many questions. As for the breastfeeding comment: I still do not know anyone or have ever seen anyone that would get mad about that. It’s a natural body function.
67. You’re not judged for keeping your natural body hair.
Yeah if I kept my normal body hair pretty sure every girl I slept with would judge me very heavily. I’m hairy and have to manage it, alright?
68. You can sweat naturally without being shamed or judged – and the media shows people of your gender sweating from physical activity a lot more often.
Lol thank god I have my sweat privilege.
69. You get to have your gender represented in the media as “strong” without writers going out of their way to have a “strong female character” as a unique take. These characters are actually, as Bijhan Valibeigi put it, “rarely strong and barely characters.”
Have you seen most white men in modern movies? They are usually bigger bitches than golden retrievers (sidenote: I actually love goldens).
70. Your gender dominates influential media institutions such as the Academy Award voting membership, which is 77% male. Women have far fewer media executive positions and are far less likely to be celebrated for success in categories such as Best Director.
Because there is not as many of them.
71. Fiction can depict the everyday, mundane lives of people of your gender without being labeled as “men’s fiction” and taken less seriously than so-called “real” literature – like “women’s fiction” and “chick lit.”
I didn’t even know these things were a thing. What kind of angry hole do you live under?
72. Writers of your gender are more likely to be published, have their books reviewed, and get other publishing industry attention that gets their books widely read.
Self publishing is the future. If anything, this helps women more by driving more men toward self-slaughtering trad publishing.
73. Film and television characters of your gender have more substantive dialogue. The Bechdel Test measures whether a story includes at least two women who talk to each other about anything other than a man, and a huge number of popular films fail it.
I don’t see how this is a privilege for me considering I don’t really watch movies nor do they actually impact my life in any way whatsoever. What do I gain if two women in some movie I’ll never watch don’t talk to each other? Seriously what the fuck.
74. Characters of your gender or more often written with a focus on more of their attributes than just their appearance. The recently coined Jane Test looked at descriptions of women in screenplays and found that they almost always centered on the character’s appearance and not much else.
Welcome to Hollywood, baby. Take it up with them.
75. Characters of your gender are more likely to know what to do – how often do you see women in movies asking men “What do we do now?” Here’s a video to remind you.
Yeah, I guess we’re good at that considering we’ve been doing it for 50000 years.
76. A character of your gender in an ensemble cast is less likely to be objectified as a sex symbol in posters and advertisements, like women superheroes are.
Apparently you have never seen any type of chick flick poster or male movie actors.
77. Successful people of your gender who are athletes, actors, and other public figures are respected by the media for what they do – not just their appearance and clothes.
Who doesn’t respect women athletes? I mean there are quite a few really badass ones – especially in the MMA realm.
78. You can easily enjoy sports with athletes of your gender, as men’s sports get more airtime and promotion than women’s sports.
They are more interesting to watch usually, sorry for the reality check.
79. Branding and advertisements don’t put limits on your potential from the time you’re a child, sending messages that your gender isn’t smart or that you “need a husband.”
Author has never seen an ad of a father being lousy, failing, or being lame apparently. Which there are frequent instances of.
80. Advertisements are a lot less likely to objectify you, portraying you literally as an object or a tool for men’s pleasure, as is so common for women.
Nope they just objectify us as stubborn-minded imbeciles instead.
81. Romantic films are less likely to portray a character of your gender being stalked as a sweet sign of affection, which creates toxic norms around harassment and intrusion as a way of pursuing you.
What kind of romantic films are you into?
And yet again, only women tend to watch these.
82. Comedians of your gender don’t face stereotypes of your gender as universally “unfunny.”
That’s because most of them aren’t funny.
83. You can use the internet without being harassed.
That is the funniest thing I’ve read all day. Take a glance at my comments section lady.
84. You can be an online gamer without being harassed, threatened, or demeaned.
Author has clearly never played CoD against a 10 year old before.
85. In online gaming, you can play characters of your gender that aren’t hypersexualized.
Where are they? Cause they all seem to be buff badass men that look like they could fuck a universe out of a grapefruit.
86. Your gender is more represented in film, with women making up 12% of protagonists, 29% of major characters, and 30% of speaking characters in the top 100 grossing films.
I feel like I’m on repeat: how does this actually benefit me, at all, in the slightest imaginable way possible?
87. People of your gender in the media can age naturally without scrutiny, even being said to get “finer with age.” Women in industries like modeling, acting, and TV journalism are more likely to be pushed out of their careers as they age.
This is a carbon repeat of #56.
88. Your gender is more represented in the documentary industry, with people more likely to trust men with documentaries and give them funding, resources, and recognition for their projects.
You clearly just pulled this out of your man-hating book. Investments go where the money is made. Plus, yet again, there are more men doing this so obviously more men will get funding.
Politics and Law
89. If a person of your gender isn’t elected to public office, it’s not because of their gender.
This sentence is worded terribly. There are plenty of female politicians, including many that rule entire nations, such as Germany.
90. A political candidate of your gender doesn’t have to face media scrutiny that reinforces gendered stereotypes of not being suited for leadership.
Yes they do. And they should. I don’t want a bitch male as president.
91. A political candidate of your gender isn’t scrutinized more for his appearance than his abilities.
Clearly this was written before Donald Trump. Orange dude, fake hair, etc. Men get it plenty.
92. A political candidate of your gender won’t be penalized by the idea that they can’t balance both family life and public office.
No one does this.
93. Politicians of your gender aren’t said to have their abilities negatively affected by bodily functions like menstruation.
Who the hell is going around saying women can’t do things because they bleed sometimes? Where are you getting this information? I think you’re insane.
94. Fictional media is more likely to show your gender in positions of political leadership, giving the public the impression that you’re naturally born to be in charge.
“Fictional media”. Do I need to say more?
95. Political leaders of your gender aren’t judged for not demonstrating “lady-like” behavior that’s the opposite of qualities that public views as leadership skills, like confidence or “not being afraid to speak your mind.”
They are judged if they do not act masculine. It’s the same.
96. You don’t have politicians primarily of another gender making laws to control your gender’s bodies.
They make enough to control my wallet.
97. There are more lawmakers of your gender determining the rules we all have to live by. For instance, women make up not even 20% of Congress.
Run for office, than. Nothing is stopping women from doing this.
98. There are more judges and justices of your gender determining how laws should be implemented. For example, the Supreme Court has included 108 men and only 4 women.
Run for office, than. Nothing is stopping women from doing this.
100. You can have strong political opinions without people calling you a “feminazi” or judging you for being “opinionated.”
No I can’t – anything I say immediately makes me a woman-hater or a traditional nazi.
101. You can express your political opinions without people saying you’re just doing it to impress men or are otherwise unqualified to make political decisions because of your gender.
Literally no one on the planet thinks a woman says a political opinion to “impress a man”.
But make a comment on abortion – then all of the sudden I should shut up because my gender doesn’t get a say.
Workplace and Economy
102. You can make choices to have both career and family without people assuming it’s a challenge or an unusual achievement for you to “have it all.”
Oh god, this again. We dealt with this twice already in this list.
103. You’re not insulted for going “against your gender’s nature” for choosing to have a career, but not children.
Exact same as #16
104. If you choose to have children, you’re not questioned about how having a family would hurt your ability to do your job.
Yes we are. Any boss would be worried about a decline in productivity from the lack of sleep, sick days, and new (more important) obligations that children bring.
105. As a parent, you get more professional opportunities – avoiding the “Motherhood Penalty” that hurts women’s careers if they have children.
So suddenly if I have a baby I get more professional opportunities? Sure, okay. We’ll go with that.
Brb, telling my boss I have 3 kids now.
106. You’re less likely to take on childcare costs if your children have a mother you don’t live with.
Author has clearly never heard of child support, alimony, or the truth about divorce courts.
107. You’re paid more for your work. On average, white women earn 78 cents to white men’s dollar, with wages going down to 64 cents for Black women, 54 cents for Latina women, and 59 cents for Native American and Alaska Native women.
This has been debunked 5000 times. Do research.
108. You get more financial support for your work – like more financing for resources, more funding for start-ups, more lab and office space.
Because there are more men trying to get this funding.
109. You’re assumed to be the leader of your household – so you can avoid stereotypes like assuming you’d have to “check with your husband” about taking a promotion.
Apparently never heard the “have to run it by my wife” meme.
110. If you have a “man’s” name on your resume, you’re more likely to get an interview for a more prestigious job than if you had a “woman’s” name.
Get more skills and experience. That counts for a lot more than your name.
111. You’re more likely to work in “formal employment,” which is government regulated to insure wages and certain rights, and less likely work in “pink collar jobs,” like domestic labor, which are considered “women’s work” and have less stability, job security, and pay.
Lol what? Most blue collar workers are men. This is much rougher conditions than your office.
112. You have a lower risk of living in poverty. 1 in 7 women and 4 in 10 single-mother families are poor, with the poverty rate for Native American, Black, and Latina women at almost double the rate for white women.
There are many reasons for this, which could justify an article of its own. But it has little to do with gender, and more to do with actions of those individuals or their parents.
113. If you’re a single father, that doesn’t put your household at the highest risk for poverty – lone mother households are most susceptible.
Yeah, because they work more hours and are recorded as more productive. Research demonstrates this as well.
114. You can negotiate for raises, promotions, and more without being seen as too aggressive.
No, we’re definitely seen as too aggressive. We just do it anyway.
115. You’re not stereotyped at work as not belonging in higher paid roles, like being mistaken for the nurse if you’re the doctor, or for a secretary when you’re a lawyer.
I have seen this happen. That’s a fair point as well.
116. You can put little time into your appearance without a negative impact on your work life, like having people believe you’re unprofessional or not put together.
That…. Makes no sense. The only thing you do different is put on makeup. Which you clearly don’t have to do to look professional if you don’t want too.
117. You can spend less on products to maintain your “professional” appearance. Women are expected to spend more on clothing, accessories, and beauty products, even when they’re earning less.
No man “expects” you to do this. Many men would prefer you didn’t.
118. You can be assertive at work without being labeled “bitchy” or “bossy.”
No but we’ll be labelled as “douchey” or “dickish”.
119. You’re more likely to be perceived as a leader.
You’ve said this 3 times now.
120. You can benefit from “good ol’ boy” networks that are the key to many paths to success.
Good ol boy networks are gender irrelevant. Just look at the police force.
121. If you’re never promoted, it’s not because of your gender.
If you’re never promoted, it’s not because of your gender either. It’s because you suck or your company does.
122. You’re less likely to be penalized for not putting up with sexual harassment and misogyny from co-workers and bosses – they’re often normalized as part of the workplace, with one survey showing 1 in 3 women experiencing harassment at work.
If they went to HR that shit would get remedied so fast it would cause a big enough explosion to get an old van from 0 to 60 in 5 seconds.
123. You’re less vulnerable to gender norms trapping you in financial abuse – for women in relationships with abusive men, society’s idea of men as breadwinners can make financial abuse go unnoticed and more difficult to recover from.
Does “financial abuse” mean men not buying you things? What exactly is financial abuse, aside from trying to effectively manage money?
124. If you’re careless with money, it’s not attributed to your gender.
No, it just shows we’re idiots. I’d rather have an excuse.
125. Hiring managers in well-paid fields like science and technology look for “masculine stereotypes” that lead them to view you as more favorable than a woman candidate. Gender biases make them judge the same qualifications more positively for men.
What? Masculinity is a horrible trait in a workplace. You need to be sitting, quiet, submissive, and just do your day-to-day. That’s not masculine. That’s submissive.
126. You can get upset at work without people blaming your emotions on “hormones,” “PMS,” or “being oversensitive.”
Anyone getting upset at work does have some type of hormone problem or is oversensitive. It’s work, calm down.
127. You’re less likely to have your failures at work as a sign that your gender shouldn’t be doing this type of work. This is especially true in male-dominated industries and leadership positions.
Maybe if your work involves lifting heavy stuff, sure. But in white collar? Nah.
128. You can take jobs like service industry positions in restaurants or bars without worrying about normalized sexual harassment based on your gender.
I agree with this. I hate seeing waitresses and female bartenders getting BS thrown at them. As a former bartender it was beyond annoying to deal with. Just let them do their jobs, man.
129. You’re not assumed to be responsible for menial “lady” tasks, like decorating for the office party.
I would love to do that. Feel free to give me that lady task. I’d gladly take that privilege. Those decorations would be dope.
130. You’re less likely to be addressed with demeaning language at work, and more likely to be addressed with respect – unlike women who are referred to as “girls” or called nicknames reflecting stereotypes of women as intellectually inferior, like “honey” and “sweetheart.”
It is just meant as a term of endearment. I don’t do it, but I’ve heard old guys say it. Those days are limited, most men don’t like calling women anything besides “hey”… unless they wear a fedora. Plus, old women call me “honey” or “dearest”. You don’t see me making a movement about it.
131. You can look up to professional role models of your gender in your field and see them lauded for their achievements, not just their appearance.
So can you. Don’t give me that.
132. You’re not stuck between the stereotype of your gender being dependent on a partner and the shame directed at women who choose to be or have to be.
We’re shamed for not getting married too, no worries.
133. You’re more likely to be remembered for your own work accomplishments, rather than your marriage or appearance.
I don’t want to be remembered for my work accomplishments, that sounds so lame. My friends, hobbies, and family are way more important. Remember me for those!
134. Your gender is more represented in higher paid positions. For instance, women are fewer than 5% of Fortune 500 CEOS.
Nothing is stopping women from climbing up the ranks of the horrible corporate ladder. You want to be miserable like the rest of them, go for it.
135. You can have your skills recognized in well-paid positions like tech fields. For instance, researchers found that women software developers (who make up a very small percentage of the field) had their coding work rated higher than men in a study – unless they revealed their gender.
Where the hell do you work man?
136. You’re more likely to have your work cited in journalism and political science. Women experts are cited so rarely that some political scientists created Women Also Know Stuff to encourage people to also include the expertise of women.
Clearly have never worked in academia or you would understand why this is BS.
137. You’re less likely to have people justify not hiring people of your gender with the belief that there are simply “no qualified candidates” of your gender in the field.
This is not a gendered problem. No qualified candidates is a widespread issue with companies nowadays. Trust me, I applied to over 200 jobs when I graduated from my grad degree program.
138. You’re less likely to work in jobs that commodify “pleasant” emotions, with roles that give “service with a smile,” like flight attendants, assumed to be “natural” roles for women.
No, we just don’t pick those jobs as often as you do.
139. You’re not expected to put in unpaid emotional labor, like maintaining office harmony, in addition to your work duties. People don’t believe that your gender is just more suited to this often unrecognized and uncompensated work.
Instead we’re expected to put in unpaid physical labor.
140. You’re less likely to have clients and colleagues ask someone of another gender a question that should’ve been directed to you. In one survey, 88% of senior-level women in Silicon Valley reported this happening.
People do this to me all the time. Go right above my paygrade.
Which is fine. Less work for me. No complaints here.
Childhood and Education
141. People give you toys that are more likely to be educational, to develop a range of skills, and to let you imagine a range of career possibilities – while toys considered “girls’ toys” are often limited to beauty, housework and childcare.
I get socks. That’s not very educational. I’d rather get some cooking pans ffs.
142. You can be assertive without being told to “not be so bossy.”
Nah, we just get told to “not be such a dick”.
143. Adults compliment you more for your abilities rather than only your looks, and you’re not taught that the most important thing about you is your appearance.
No – we just don’t get complimented. Seriously, I always hear women complain about compliments but I’m just over here like damn I wish someone besides my girl would tell me I have a nice watch or some shit.
144. School dress codes don’t suggest that your body is inherently shameful or unprofessional, unlike girls who are told that it’s up to them to cover up.
Dear diary, today in catholic school…
145. Your grades don’t depend on your appearance – studies show that girls are given higher grades based on physical attractiveness, reinforcing that their value is in their looks, not their brains.
Those studies are all BS and you know it.
Most women get better grades because they’re more focused on academic achievement. Which should be a good thing, in your book.
146. You get more “esteem building” rewards in school, like being called on first even when you’re not raising your hand.
No, we’re told to be quiet and submissive while resisting our manhood/hyper-activity and playful demeanor.
147. You get a higher amount and quality of attention from teachers, like more substantive feedback that improves your learning.
I had a teacher talk to me once. It was when I was getting suspended.
And plus, the majority of teachers are female. So even if this was an actual issue, I don’t see how it’s a mans fault.
148. Your energetic behavior and creative energy is encouraged or dismissed with phrases like “boys will be boys.” Girls are taught to be “lady-like,” which includes being more reserved and less outspoken.
How many times are you going to put lady-like in quotations and think it means anything. Boys are told to shut up and play along just as much.
149. You’re not told that you’re supposed to be bad at math and science because of your gender.
Literally no one says this.
150. People are more likely to respect your bodily autonomy – they don’t say things like “your father’s going to need a shotgun” to imply that your sexuality belongs to men throughout your life.
With how much you talk about sexual assault, clearly your father does need a shotgun.
151. Clothing made for you doesn’t reinforce stereotypes of your gender as “too pretty” to be smart.
This is the stupidest thing I have read all month. Should I say that you buy your own clothing? Or should I say that you pick what you wear? Or do I say that clothing doesn’t signify intelligence? Or should I ask how the fuck clothing makes you look “too pretty to be smart”? Where would I even begin with this completely moronic statement. Ugh. Hard pass.
152. You aren’t raised to believe your gender is inherently more delicate or weak with phrases like “you throw like a girl.”
You are weaker. It’s biology. Deal with it.
You can also create conscious beings inside of you. I can’t. That’s impressive.
Win some, lose some.
153. As you’re growing up, you have more positive role models of your gender to choose from in media, history books, fiction, and more.
I wish I could have had Walter White as my role model growing up.
154. Academic resources are more likely to cite the work of people of your gender.
Clearly never worked in academia. Also, this is really close to #136 again.
155. If you’re in college, you’re more likely to be judged as knowledgeable by your peers.
The individual person is judged, not the gender.
156. If you’re in college, you’re more likely to have professors respond to your inquiries, especially if you’re white.
…What? Respond to my inquiries? When I was in college I would rather they just leave me alone and let me get my own grades.
What professors don’t respond to inquiries? It’s pretty universally required.
157. At school, you can learn about your gender’s contributions to the world without needing extra electives or men’s studies departments to be included in the curriculum.
We could use a men’s studies department. That would be equality.
Religion (And the Lack Thereof)
158. If you’re religious, you’re much more likely to have religious leaders of your gender, with every major religion led by men.
Yes. Because that’s what the religious beliefs of those groups are.
159. If you’re religious, you’re less likely to be assumed incapable of choosing your religion for yourself, like when people assume that Muslim women need “saving.”
They don’t want saved.
160 If you’re religious, you’re less likely to have your beliefs attributed to “irrationality” and scientific ineptitude natural for your gender.
Hahahhaahhaha – clearly never spoken to an atheist before.
161. If you’re religious, you’re less likely to have your holy texts like the Bible interpreted in ways that justify mistreating people of your gender – like silencing women – and less likely to have passages that affirm your gender ignored.
It’s not misinterpreted. Nor is it mistreatment. It’s religion.
162. If you’re religious, you can find a place of worship that doesn’t treat your gender as inferior. For instance, feminist Christian churches exist, but in many areas, the only options for worship are churches that follow patriarchal traditions.
“Feminist Christian churches” are not real churches. They are clearly not following their religious text, and should not be called Christian.
163. If you’re not religious and looking for community, male leadership also dominates the public atheist domain, and leaders often perpetuate sexism in atheist circles, too.
Can’t speak on this, don’t run in atheist circles.
164. You’re not excluded from atheism based on the idea that “rationality” is not characteristic of your gender.
Can’t speak on this, don’t run in atheist circles.
165. You can be part of atheist communities without risking gender-based harassment.
Can’t speak on this, don’t run in atheist circles.
166. Sacred and religious figures and deities like the Christian God are usually portrayed as your gender.
Uhh, because they are male, obviously. The different religious texts say that repeatedly.
167. You can practice a religion that centers around your gender without facing harassment and backlash. For instance, women-centered sects of Paganism and Wicca sometimes have to deal with misogyny.
Really? You choose pagans as your front-facing example of misogyny? Not, I don’t know, Islam? Wicca and Pagans are mostly women-centered. Why you think they deal with any more misogyny than someone else, I’ll never understand. But yet again, I don’t run in Pagan/Wiccan circles so can’t really speak on this truthfully.
There are some good arguments and points in this article. And there are some that are complete trash.
Just like how some feminists talking points are legit, while others are not so much.
Us, as a society can’t continue to keep tearing the other gender down. We need to work together.
Discussion is the first step of that.
If I’m wrong on some of these points, tell me. I’ll reconsider. Just the same as me telling you that you are wrong in interpreting many of these as “privileges” that I receive, when I don’t.
Keep the discussions going, let’s get a few steps closer to fixing this shit for all of us.
All the best,